Graceful Maneuver

Long story short, I’ve had some minor life bumps lately that have kept me off the bike. But I finally had some time to myself this weekend and it just happened to be 70 degrees and sunny at the same time.

In November.

In New Jersey.

I was getting on that bike no matter what.

Since I’ve gotten my new shoes and pedals, I’ve only ridden maybe twice. I’ve had some issues clipping in to the left pedal. It’s not the clip in to the pedal part. It’s the flipping around of the pedal to get the clip in side where it needs to be. Thanks to many well experienced people both at the LBS and on this blog, I’ve been very cognizant of making sure I can stop and land safely. So far so good.

I happily hopped on my bike and made sure to clip in on the left side first. I serenely rode down to the bay. I noticed a lot of sailing ships and decided to stop at the park that overlooks the bay.




Ok, I’m thinking. I need a landing zone. I pass by a police car parked by the pathway there where Vinny, a cop I’ve known for years, was taking a break and just looking out over the bay. I pass by a woman taking pictures of the beautiful boats on the water. I unclip my left foot and keep half pedaling with my right. I decide to turn onto a boardwalk path in order to get to a bench there. I’m doing fine until I also unclip my right foot just moments before I see that the boardwalk I am approaching is about 2 inches higher than the path.

The following things run through my brain in about the time span of one second:

A. I know from experience that the bottoms of these shoes are so slick that I can’t pedal without being clipped in. My shoes just slip off the pedals.

B. I know that once I hit that 2 inch bump, it’s going to slow me down too much and I’m not going to make it to that bench over there.

C. The grass is not only damp, which will make my slippery shoes slip, but it is also an EXTREMELY popular area for large groups of geese who spend a LOT of time there.

As my bike hopped up to the boardwalk, where it abruptly ceased to propel itself forward and instead leaned toward the grass, I said aloud to no one in particular, “Oh man. This is not gonna be pretty.”

My bike comes to a stop, my foot hits the wet grass and goose poop, slides like wax on ice, and I fall off the bike directly into a large pile of poop. I could not have made a more perfect landing into the most heavily concentrated area of poop if I had tried. Of course, I quickly get up to see if anyone saw me.

Vinny the cop is in his squad car, kindly looking the other way, probably laughing uncontrollably.



The lady taking pictures is still taking pictures of boats.



Ok, I only have to be embarrassed in front of one person.

Sure enough, as I rode out of the park, Vinny, with a big smile on his face, yelled to me, "Hey Linda, how's it going?"

I answered, "Slowly."

You would think it would be a "crappy" ride home.

But I actually laughed the whole way with this ridiculous grin on my face that said, "Yep. That's me. Grace in action!"